In a world where everyone on the Internet can claim to be an expert, who can you trust to present your adult brand with widely admired honesty and professionalism?

Well, the illustrious Alex Suze has created a very cool site - Sex Toy Buzz - that reviews products, video, literature and services that claim to be the best and puts them to the test.

Sex Toys Buzz is the latest venture from the team behind the incredibly successful AlexSuze.com site. The Sex Toys Buzz approach is built on years of developing trusted relationships with international adult product producers and retailers.

The Sex Toys Buzz philosophy is based on the belief that outstanding presentation of your products, visually and in terms of SEO, is crucial. It’s no good just throwing your ad in a link farm or having your product review buried on some un-searchable back page.

What I like: Clean and uncluttered layout and the adult toy reviews are complete and passionate. Reviews are performed in-house by and created around each product, not constrained by a list of standard criteria. The Alex Suze team understand that every product is different – and their reviews reflect that.

Nifty too: They’ve created professional-standard videos for many of the products they review. Hello YouTube generation.

Marketing Coo & Relevance: Alex Suze’s videos generate 25-30,000 views per month - that translates into great sales! So if you’re a manufacturer, service provider or retailer in the adult industry seeking to increase your profile, this a great way to or a consumer to get some hellified exposure!

For everyone else & all round sexual deviants: You now have another outlet for honest sex toy reviews.

One of my favorite reads in LifeHack.org, the blog is fantastic, just about every entry discusses something that is related to professional and personal success. It it goes a step further to discuss the opposites of success; it addresses failure and fear, but then tells you how these things contribute to long-term success and how they shape who you become. Who you are directly effects the way your business runs and who you are effects weather or not your business is successful. If you aren’t positive, willing to take risks and adapt to the ever changing internet environment, how can your business flourish and grow? Well actually, it can’t and it will die.

So here is my favorite article this month “10 Skills You Need To Success At Almost Anything”, a great little ditty about professional success.  It’s for the webmasters and business owners proactive and ready to take action in getting themselves noticed.

- Callie Simms

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What does it take to succeed? A positive attitude? Well, sure, but that’s hardly enough. The Law of Attraction? The Secret? These ideas might act as spurs to action, but without the action itself, they don’t do much.

Success, however it’s defined, takes action, and taking good and appropriate action takes skills. Some of these skills (not enough, though) are taught in school (not well enough, either), others are taught on the job, and still others we learn from general life experience.

Below is a list of general skills that will help anyone get ahead in practically any field, from running a company to running a gardening club. Of course, there are skills specific to each field as well – but my concern here is with the skills that translate across disciplines, the ones that can be learned by anyone in any position.

1. Public Speaking

The ability to speak clearly, persuasively, and forcefully in front of an audience – whether an audience of 1 or of thousands – is one of the most important skills anyone can develop. People who are effective speakers come across as more comfortable with themselves, more confident, and more attractive to be around. Being able to speak effectively means you can sell anything – products, of course, but also ideas, ideologies, worldviews. And yourself – which means more opportunities for career advancement, bigger clients, or business funding.

2. Writing

Writing well offers many of the same advantages that speaking well offers: good writers are better at selling products, ideas, and themselves than poor writers. Learning to write well involves not just mastery of grammar but the development of the ability to organize one’s thoughts into a coherent form and target it to an audience in the most effective way possible. Given the huge amount of text generated by almost every transaction – from court briefs and legislation running into the thousands of pages to those foot-long receipts you get when you buy gum these days – a person who is a master of the written word can expect doors to open in just about every field.

3. Self-Management

If success depends of effective action, effective action depends on the ability to focus your attention where it is needed most, when it is needed most. Strong organizational skills, effective productivity habits, and a strong sense of discipline are needed to keep yourself on track.

4. Networking

Networking is not only for finding jobs or clients. In an economy dominated by ideas and innovation, networking creates the channel through which ideas flow and in which new ideas are created. A large network, carefully cultivated, ties one into not just a body of people but a body of relationships, and those relationships are more than just the sum of their parts. The interactions those relationships make possible give rise to innovation and creativity – and provide the support to nurture new ideas until they can be realized.

5. Critical Thinking

We are exposed to hundreds, if not thousands, of times more information on a daily basis than our great-grandparents were. Being able to evaluate that information, sort the potentially valuable from the trivial, analyze its relevance and meaning, and relate it to other information is crucial – and woefully under-taught. Good critical thinking skills immediately distinguish you from the mass of people these days.

6. Decision-Making

The bridge that leads from analysis to action is effective decision-making – knowing what to do based on the information available. While not being critical can be dangerous, so too can over-analyzing, or waiting for more information before making a decision. Being able to take in the scene and respond quickly and effectively is what separates the doers from the wannabes.

7. Math

You don’t have to be able to integrate polynomials to be successful. However, the ability to quickly work with figures in your head, to make rough but fairly accurate estimates, and to understand things like compound interest and basic statistics gives you a big lead on most people. All of these skills will help you to analyze data more effectively – and more quickly – and to make better decisions based on it.

8. Research

Nobody can be expected to know everything, or even a tiny fraction of everything. Even within your field, chances are there’s far more that you don’t know than you do know. You don’t have to know everything – but you should be able to quickly and painlessly find out what you need to know. That means learning to use the Internet effectively, learning to use a library, learning to read productively, and learning how to leverage your network of contacts – and what kinds of research are going to work best in any given situation.

9. Relaxation

Stress will not only kill you, it leads to poor decision-making, poor thinking, and poor socialization. So be failing to relax, you knock out at least three of the skills in this list – and really more. Plus, working yourself to death in order to keep up, and not having any time to enjoy the fruits of your work, isn’t really “success”. It’s obsession. Being able to face even the most pressing crises with your wits about you and in the most productive way is possibly the most important thing on this list.

10. Basic Accounting

It is a simple fact in our society that money is necessary. Even the simple pleasures in life, like hugging your child, ultimately need money – or you’re not going to survive to hug for very long. Knowing how to track and record your expenses and income is important just to survive, let alone to thrive. But more than that, the principles of accounting apply more widely to things like tracking the time you spend on a project or determining whether the value of an action outweighs the costs in money, time, and effort. It’s a shame that basic accounting isn’t a required part of the core K-12 curriculum.

What Else?

Surely there are more important skills I’m not thinking of (which is probably why I’m not telling Bill Gates what to do!) – what are they? What have I missed? What lessons have you learned that were key to your successes – and what have you ignored to your peril?

On October 15th, more than 2,000 blogs around the world will write about poverty and will participate in Blog Action Day. I encourage everyone to join in. I know I will. - Callie

Blog Action Day is an annual nonprofit event that aims to unite the world’s bloggers, podcasters and videocasters, to post about the same issue on the same day. Our aim is to raise awareness and trigger a global discussion.

Global issues like poverty are extremely complex. There is no simple, clear answer. By asking thousands of different people to give their viewpoints and opinions, Blog Action Day creates an extraordinary lens through which to view these issues. Each blogger brings their own perspective and ideas. Each blogger posts relating to their own blog topic. And each blogger engages their audience differently

Blog Action Day 2008 Poverty from Blog Action Day on Vimeo.

Kudos to Colleen & BuzzNetworker for posting this! Blog Action Day has several resources to assist bloggers through the event as well.

What does a pornstar, sex worker, escort or fetish model do after they retire?

When do they know it’s time to retire? Is there a specific way to retire? Or should they just take a long, open ended hiatus?

Is there a plan for retirement and leaving the adult entertainment industry?

Can you successfully leave this industry and never come back?

These are all the questions an adult entertainer asks his or her self every year. Should it be this year or should they be in one more?

Retirement is a complicated decision; there are no simple answers.

To me, retirement has always been a personal decision that’s based on a person’s mental state of mind and what point they are at on their life path. When the time came for me to make this decision, I spent a great deal of time researching retirement. I talked to women I know who have successfully retired, I talked to women who have retired and come back.

And what I’ve surmised is that, once you are part of the adult industry, it is very difficult to leave it. Finding “mainstream work” is often difficult because of the stigma that attached to the profession, adding “Pornstar” to your resume when interviewing for a job isn’t actually helpful in most cases. Many entertainers choose to omit it, but then it creates gaps in their resumes that they then have to lie to fill in.

In my research, I found this absolutely amazing post on Kink.com’s Blog that hit the nail on the head (they are the leader in Fetish Kink porn and now I believe they deserve some kudos for showing another side to their talent’s lives). As you can see, the women are women are very different in their daily lives and dress than they are on camera, just like any mainstream actor you see on the big screen.

Here are my opinions and beliefs on retirement:

In the adult industry, you have a shelf life. For a porn stars, it’s usually 2-3 years (there are always exceptions, if they become a major brand with a huge following, there is a lot more to leverage) on film. Then they usually become sex workers afterwards or start directing and producing themselves.

For a person who’s never been on the camera end of the adult business and entered the business as a stripper, prostitute or dominatrix, it’s a bit longer. My belief is that one has a “shelf life” of about five years (there are some amazing exceptions to the rule). That is based on a few factors, including: time in the industry, growing/refining/changing the services offered (and experimentation with the brand that is one’s professional persona) and the area in which an entertainer works. It’s a harsh reality, but in general, the clients that get used to men and women in a certain area and eventually will get tired of them. The area dries up and the entertainer has to relocate and/or reinvent their persona (but that’s another blog I will write at another time).

I started in the adult industry in 2004 and worked in different aspects of it and I still work. But in 2007, I started planning my exit strategy. I took my background that I had tabled for a few years and combined it with my (sometimes hard learned) adult entertainment knowledge and started my own adult marketing and web development firm. I continued my “professional” working as I simultaneously worked to develop and establish a company with a unique business approach and voice.

Two weeks ago, I decided (as I thought through all the questions above) it was time to retire myself and focus on what I want most, which is to continue growing the company. So my own retirement is based on personal goals and desire and wanting the next step.

It’s scary really, I feel what I am doing is still in its infancy, I am further along thank I think. Mainly because of my transparent business style and sheer neurotic drive to create the next enriching part of my life. I am lucky to be able to combine my adult experiences with the education I received in college (marketing/English degree) and create a company built upon my passions.

So here I come world, an retired escort/dominatrix/3-porn movie star - turned amazing adult marketer & adult SEO guru.

And here’s to all those who’ve retired and dared to to take the next step.

And if that retirement brought you back, awesome. Kudos for taking the time to discover what was best for you for a short period of time. Worked should be based on passion, no matter what work it is.

NOTE: I promise a more in depth exploration of adult industry retirement. There is too much to be crammed into on one post.

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Many of use Twitter. And all who use it, become ADDICTED. And everyday - at least three times - we get the dreaded “Twitter is Over Capacity.” The Whale, fails. We proceed to beat our heads, scream and shout obscenities.

Like an addict & withdrawals, we are unpacifiable until the whale stops its fail and our Twitter returns.

Well, what happens when Hitler’s twitter fails (it’s supposed to be funny, not upsetting).

Click: HERE

The Spread Magazine blog always has the best posts.

To me, the term “high class” can’t and shouldn’t be defined by rates on a woman’s website. High-class is defined by personality, the perception of  one’s self and a women’s view of her SELF WORTH.

- Callie

Here is the blog post:

I’m officially over “high class escort” hysteria.

I get it, we all get it: these women charge a lot per hour, therefore they must be the best looking, and the best lay, and their sexy, glamorous lifestyle makes them seem more on par with celebrities than it does other sex workers. Except for the fact that those assumptions often aren’t even true. And, sadly, “high class” callgirls are the only sex workers allowed a voice in the media, the only group to whom they will regularly give a platform. Not only is this particular brand of sex worker visibility criminally exclusive, but it’s perpetuating a series of ugly stereotypes, even when the callgirls in question are being contracted to allegedly dispel myths about their work, as is the case with this Salon “Ask A Callgirl” feature. Asking questions like “what about Belle can you relate to” doesn’t actually address any of the problems inherent in the media’s understanding of a “high class escort.”

Read the rest of this entry »

I have been a bit quiet for the past week, wow - life is a whirlwind storm and we get caught up in it. I logged in to spend the next six hours on this site (Go Callie, Go Callie) and I found some interesting comments and links. I have been TAGGED by Peridot Ash. Peridot, (whom I am going to fantasize about tonight because I am in love with her writing) is a beautiful woman that has successfully added herself & her new webspace to the many strong voices female sex workers online. Her post on today on “Gratitude” struck me and I am writing my five things (below), and what’s more, I am going to follow her example and I will write a “gratitude related” post on the 5th of every month also

Here’s my list:
1. Self-realization & actualization
2. My fabulous living space
3. My cat
4. My best friend
5. Everyone who has ever taught me anything, both good and bad

Tagged: Carl La Fong, Dark Gracie, Debauchette, Spread Blog on “High Class Whores”, Kimberlee Cline and Peridot Ash.

If you’ve been tagged, write a post on your blog with a list of five things you’re grateful for. Then tag some other bloggers.